Monday, December 13, 2010

A Conversation between a Software Engineer and His Wife.

Husband - Hey dear, I am logged in.

Wife - Would you like to have some snacks?

Husband - Hard disk full.

Wife - Have you brought the saree.

Husband - Bad command or file name.

Wife - But I told you about it in the morning.

Husband - Erroneous syntax, abort, retry, cancel.

Wife - Hae bhagwan! Forget it, where's your salary.

Husband - File in use, read only, try after some time. 

Wife - At least give me your credit card, I can do some shopping.

Husband - Sharing violation, access denied.

Wife - I made a mistake in marrying you!

Husband - Data type mismatch.

Wife - You are useless.

Husband - By default.

Wife - Who was there with you in the car this morning?

Husband - System unstable; press ctrl, alt, del to Reboot.

Wife - What is the relation between you & your receptionist?

Husband - The only user with write permission.

Wife - What is my value in your life?

Husband - Unknown virus detected.

Wife - Do you love me or your computer?

Husband - Too many parameters.

Wife - I will go to my dad's house.

Husband - Program performed illegal operation, it will Close.

Wife - I will leave you forever.

Husband - Close all programs and log out for another User.

Wife - It is worthless talking to you.

Husband - Shut down the computer.

Wife - I am going

Husband - Its now safe to turn off your computer.



A Fishy Story

A guy who lives at  Lake Conroe (50 miles north of Houston) saw a ball bouncing around kind of strange in the lake and went to investigate. 

It turned out to be a flat head catfish that had apparently tried to swallow a basketball which became stuck in its mouth!

The fish was totally exhausted from trying to dive, but unable to, because the ball would always bring him back up to the surface. The guy tried numerous times to get the ball out, but was unsuccessful. He finally had his wife cut the ball in order to deflate it and release the hungry catfish. 

You probably wouldn't have believed this, if you hadn't seen the following pictures: 

Moral: Be kinder than necessary because everyone bites off more than they can chew sometime in life.



Sunday, December 12, 2010

If you wanna Do Some Good, Go Ahead and Do It!

An old man lived alone in Minnesota. He wanted to spade his potato garden, but it was very hard work. His only son, who would have helped him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and mentioned his situation:

"Dear Son,", he wrote, " I am feeling pretty bad because it looks like I won't be able to plant my potato garden this year. I hate to miss doing the garden because your mother always loved planting time. I'm just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. If you were here, all my troubles would be over. I know you would dig the plot for me, if you weren't in prison. 

Shortly, the old man received this telegram: "For Heaven's sake, Dad, don't dig up the garden!! That's where I buried the WEAPONS!!"  

At 4 a.m. the next morning, a dozen FBI  agents and local police officers showed up and dug up the entire garden without finding any WEAPONS. Confused, the old man wrote another note to his son telling him what happened, and asked him what to do next.

His son's reply was: "Go ahead and plant your potatoes, Dad. It's the best I could do for you from here."

Moral: No matter where you are in the world, if you have decided to do some good deep from your heart, you can do it!